MONEY OR SEX? You've all had your say

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The Perfect World of Snapchat

“ISN’T she far too pretty to be a teacher?” This was just one of the examples of a statement made by a high profile Snapchatter that made me despair at being a blogger. I won’t mention who uttered the words but it’s safe to say she’s extremely popular and has a lot of influence, especially amongst young women and girls. 

This week, I returned to Snapchat, having come off it for a number of weeks. I didn’t miss it. At all. I hadn’t been on the social media platform for long but I felt suffocated. Disillusioned. Lost. I’ve been a journalist for a decade but this was new territory for me. I was exposing some aspects of my life for all to see and trying to be as authentic as possible. A few hundred people were watching as I did tours of the site we’re hoping to build our home on, showed people what I was buying on my big monthly shop and giving little tips on how I save money. Oh and let’s not forget my dinner tips or my latest attempt to lose the baby weight (read: cake weight. Who am I kidding, my youngest is over two now).

As far as I can see, anyone who’s anyone on the Irish Snapchat scene these days has a formula that seems to just work. They have tens of thousands of followers. The done thing seems to be to talk incessantly about different brands, different products and to attend one launch after another. There’s a lot of makeup talk, lots about tanning and contouring and a whole lot about avocados. Yes, avocados are big in the world of Snapchat and blogging. 

Weight loss is another obsession on the social media channel. I see countless people who to me, look stick thin, constantly banging on about the food they eat, how many calories or macros or whatever are in what they’re putting in their mouths. There’s a lot of talk of protein bars and clean eating. There’s the bad foods, the cheat days, the constant selfies showing off hip bones and rib cages and stick thin arms, videos of their thigh gaps running on treadmills. A few of them talk about ‘wellness’ a great deal but to me they don’t seem well at all, given what seems to be such a rigid focus on body image and such extreme control on the food they do and don’t eat. It can’t be healthy and it can’t be a good message for young people. But everyone seems to be lapping it up.

I came off Snapchat because I was fed up of watching the same things, day in day out, and thinking that if this is what people want to watch, it’s not something I have to offer. I came back on it this week in an attempt to prove to myself that sometimes being yourself is enough and that not everyone’s life is glossy, perfect and materialistic. Plus, we’ll be building our house at some point soon and everyone loves a bit of property porn!

And on top of this, I have discovered some Irish Snapchatters that don’t leave me feeling depressed or have me rolling my eyes on a regular basis, who have interesting things to say and whose lives don’t seem revolve around possessions or looking good and trying to sell something to their viewers. Of course I have nothing against beauty bloggers who make a great living out of doing what they do, but I just feel there’s a need for something different that doesn’t make people feel as if they’re frumpy and  unglamorous and some who’s not trying to flog one product after another either on behalf of themselves or another brand who’s paying them to do so.

I spoke to a couple of my favourites recently, who for a few different reasons, I really like. 

 Lindsay Hamilton. Snapchat handle: @mermaidajade

One of them is a woman from Portmarnock called Lindsay Hamilton - a nail technician in a Dublin salon called Tropical Popical, mother of two, extended breastfeeder and general gas woman who really doesn’t give a toss about what anyone thinks about her. She’s inserted a tampon on Snapchat, sucked her friend’s toes and has an alter ego from the ‘country’ who’s hilarious ramblings about her boyfriend Paddy O’Holohan leave me laughing out loud. She twerks, she talks about constipation and UTIs, and isn’t afraid to say things as they really are. 

The 29-year-old - whose sister recently appeared on First Dates Ireland - told me: “What I like about Snapchat is that it differs from other well used forms of social media. On Instagram everyone pretends to be super healthy, happy and rich. On Facebook everyone pretends to be really interested in current affairs and it's very much a 'I can change the world with this status' kind of vibe. I think Snapchat is more real. You can look rank on it and talk about thrush or inserting tampons and while covered in Sudocreme.”

On being an extended breastfeeder she said: “I haven't got any 'hate' or negativity on it yet. I'm pretty sure most of the Dublin public have seen my nipple at this point. I have breastfed everywhere from Dublin bus to the Powerscourt Centre steps. I am not going to hide away in the blue-lit loos in Supermacs for other people's comfort. I don't know if I'm an advocate I just know I have no shame.”

As for her Snapchat style, she said: “I wouldn't snap anything serious like unboxing a free bag of popcorn or seriously reviewing a shade of Essence lipliner. I'm too sarcastic for that shit. And literally cannot take myself seriously for one second. I regret loads of snaps but I don’t give a f***. Who cares? It's me either way so whether people see it or not it doesn’t make a difference. I am 'not solid in the head' as one follower wrote me the other day.”

As for the type of feedback she gets from viewers, Lindsay said: “The best snaps I receive are when people tell me that they have been going through a hard time and that I made them laugh. Ones that stand out are a woman telling me her Grandad just died and seeing Riloh and Luna-Jade playing put a smile on her face. Or a new mum coming back from hospital was laughing so much at Karen from Cavan (my bogger character) she woke her new baby up, but she didn't care. 

“The worst are obviously men just sending their langers. Most of them are made up mostly of foreskin and the usernames are like 'markybear69' so I should know better than to open them but as soon as I see anything like it I block the sick feck. It's so invasive to my day and just like gross because I'm around my kids. Sending D pics unprompted will be made illegal in a few years, mark my words.”

Eimear Varian Barry @eimearvb

Another mum who I really like watching on Snapchat is Cork woman Eimear Varian Barry, who’s an Instagram star and blogger. She might be beautiful and have lovely clothes and a gorgeous home, unlike most of the other bloggers I’ve watched, Eimear’s story isn’t a constant brag of the freebies she’s getting and she seems really down to earth and not afraid to show the more unglamorous aspects of her life and motherhood in general. She’s a mum of two and is currently breastfeeding her youngest, and she isn’t afraid to talk about it, which I love. 

She told me: “I only ever got one bad reaction on my Snapchat. Someone wrote me a message saying "unfollowing due to constant nipple talk" . Which I thought was hilarious!

Breastfeeding is hugely important to me. It's such a personal choice and it's super nice to get such great feedback on social media. I could harp on about it all day. How long you got?”

“I just started Snapchatting when I had Harper. I was talking about everything I was going through on there and didn't realise women were actually looking at it going through the same thing. I  have taken screenshots of women messaging me saying how much I have helped them and that warmed my heart. That's the beauty of social media. Support, validation etc is there for you if you need it.”

As for her parenting style, she said: “I just do whatever feels right and what suits me. Like every other mother does. I’m not really very good at routines/sticking to a plans. I prefer to  try and say yes to everything and go with the flow.”

And whether or not social media paints an accurate picture of what her life is like, she explained: “I think it's vital for people to remember that Instagram is a documentation of small pieces of your life (which I have in my bio). I do believe in putting the best version of yourself out there though. I think Snapchat is great for showing a bit more real life. 

As for what’s off limits, she said: “I would never snap tantrums/ potting training...stuff like that. I've seen it online and have thought  it was a bit  degrading for the child when he/she is older. There is the issue of oversharing, which I am very cautious of.”

Eimear, who lives in Surrey with her family, grew up in Friars Walk in Cork City but has lived in New York and Australia. She explained: “After three years in NY, I moved to Australia and was travelling up the east coast on my own for a few months after being in Melbourne for a year. I literally fell in love with Daniel over a jug of beer in a hostel in Darwin’s outback. I knew I wanted to have his babies! He moved down to Melbourne for me as I got an amazing job with The Style Co.  

“We moved back to Surrey where he is from a year later. A week after we moved back I found out i was pregnant! I set up an Instagram around that time and was just posting photos and documenting little pieces of my life. People seemed to like it and it just grew from there.” Eimear now has just under 60,000 followers on Instagram. 

Other Snapchat stars I like: @rosemarymaccabe - everyone on Snapchat knows Rosemary MacCabe by now. She’s down to earth, honest about her collaborations and talks about important issues such as feminism and other political issues, as well as about her weight loss journey.

@oneilllouise Author Louise O’Neill often lives in her bear dressing gown on Snapchat and despite being a world renowned best selling author doesn’t shy away from talking about the struggles of working from home - her hatred of washing her hair being a common complaint. Louise is down to earth and shows off her life without being braggy. She’s also a feminism guru, which I love.

If anyone knows anyone I should be following, be sure to let me know!